Thursday, December 16, 2010

Now....

I've resorted to password protect my phone. I've resorted to deleting my browser history everytime after use. I am contemplating on putting a password on my lappy. I'm contemplating on taking along a key of a cupboard that I keep some don't-wanna-expose stuff.

I don't want to resort to having to take my phone to the toilet everytime I pee. I don't want to have to leave home to survive. I don't want my safest place to turn into the most dangerous one.

I don't know if I'm over-reacting. I don't know if I'm over-thinking things. I don't know how to keep this secret.
It takes strength to fit in, it takes courage to come out
It takes strength to lie, it takes courage to say the truth

Sunday, December 12, 2010

Superhero

There are seldom moments I wished I was a superhero. But today I definitely wished I was. The breaking point came when dad called to ask me to bring his guitar dwn to him. I wished I could.. Since the car was home and sorts... but sleepiness and the 'Things to do' list absolutely overwhelmed me. As considerate as ever he would say 'its's ok'. But how ok is ok when as a daughter I've done nothing really much to even match up to a tiny fraction of how he has provided for me in these 20 odd years? I wished I was superman...

I tossed and turned after that call and definitely couldn't get back to sleep. Decided to get some stuff done up and I'm wondering how I ever got myself into such a mess. Literally. I'm too much of a hoarder I feel like I'm burying myself alive. When I can't get off the bed with my feet on the floor, I think that's too much. Too much. I wished I was Wall-E.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Never say never

As I look at my AFP cert I marvel at how life unfolds.

Back then in 2007 I ever wondered what's the point of going through so much trouble and spending $ on taking a course that will never be beneficial to me work-wise. I thought I would never have the opportunity to use the AFP mark and more interestingly, I sweared I would never sell insurance.

It's funny how life seems to have a life on its own. I guess mindsets are possible to change somehow.

Saturday, December 4, 2010

Come Back

Come back

Come back

Come back

Come back

Come back

Come back

Come back

Come back!!!!

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Be optimistic

Be optimistic

Be optimistic

Be optimistic

Be optimistic

Tears will not lead me out of my sadness, but optimism of the future can.